Hi there! This is an event I made to connect the San Francisco non-monogamy community with people who are new or curious about the scene. This event is intended to be both a lovely container for old friendships to further grow and for new people to come, ask questions, and (if interested) see how they can become more involved. I am so immensely grateful for the incredible people here, so I want to share that with you and the city.
The event is focused on being a safe space for all people of color, queer, trans, kinky, and non-monogamous folks. Pronouns will be asked for.
If you are new, here are some values that we hold to keep everyone safe (emotionally and physically):
Please only invite the most open, exploratory, no-drama, respectful, communicative, and playful people you know. Your friends should understand consent culture. You would feel comfortable staking your reputation on them (NOTE: This is different from feeling confident that they would enjoy themselves).
The event is best when treated as a high possibility, low expectation space. That means two things: first, that all kinds of awesome interactions are possible, but that no one should be expected to interact in any particular way. Second, we often attend with an expectation of the type of experience we should have. While anything is possible, you'll probably have a much better experience if you lose those expectations of yourself and open yourself up to the abundance of connections available to you at the party. That's a pretty tall order, of course -- reaching that ideal is probably something akin to enlightenment, so go easy on yourself if and when expectation and disappointment creep in!
Our community is built on trust -- that's what allows us to be as open and vulnerable as we can be inside those spaces -- but this requires that we all show up in full integrity, pledging to only physically engage with one another where there is clear consent. Respecting and valuing consent isn't just about preventing violations that shred trust, it's about making sure that everyone has as much space as they need to fully occupy their "yes".
Any event can be challenging and emotionally complex, even for seasoned veterans. This meetup will be a high challenge, high support environment. We come together to celebrate at our edges. To fully support that endeavor, I'll provide hosts who are available to provide counseling and social support throughout the event, and it also means encouraging everyone who attends to commit to being a support for everyone around them.
Everyone contributes. Outreach is never the work of a single organizer. It takes the participation and contribution of our community, so everyone who attends is expected to co-create the party as able through time, energy, enthusiasm, work, awareness, concern, and/or example.
This is a dynamic list of people, ever growing, changing, and deepening as this grand experiment in connection continues. See you soon!